15 Mar 2013

March 15th

Is it realistic for someone to permanently go without sex? After another sex scandal involving a senior member of the Catholic Church, questions are being raised about celibacy. 

There are many unrelated items on the news this morning, yet all are connected on a deeper level. 

·         A father accused of setting fire to his home, which killed six of his children, did not wash for twelve weeks and lived with his wife and his mistress.
·         Pregnant Palestine women have admitted smuggling their husband's sperm out of jail.
·         People give their account of living a celibate life. 

We are all different. To deny our sexuality would remove a part of being human. Western society dwells on the huge importance of the search for a romantic life partner. Giving up the idea is a huge sacrifice. Modern life is about sex and the individual. People in past centuries were either married, in which case they could have sex, or celibate if they were not. Now the options are more varied.

Certain individuals live a free life, some would say irresponsible, and indulge their sexual drive with whoever takes their eye at any given time. The spread of Aids should have halted the free love explosion which begun in the sixties. Unfortunately, young people still disregard the need for protection.

Still others choose to abstain from sex in their role of devoting their life to God or for personal reasons. See twelve revelations here.

Some choose a partner for life and vow to remain true—often failing. I made a similar choice when I married at nineteen years of age. For twenty-seven years, I remained with my husband until I was forced to leave to save myself. I can keep my vow in my final marriage of over twenty years.
Gandhi - www.topnews.com

To the purists, celibacy, derived from the Latin for unmarried, means a permanent state of being without sex. Abstinence can be temporary. And it's possible to be abstinent in a relationship. True celibacy means a life without both sex and a spouse or partner. Of course, there are many who give it a looser definition—indicating some sort of commitment to be without sex.

Often, celibacy is thrust upon men via loss of libido. If they're not ready for life's sentence, they try medical aids and counseling to regain their vigor. 

Studies show that men are driven by testosterone to want sex. Women are driven to a lesser degree by a mixture of testosterone and estrogen. Given these facts, perhaps celibacy is a totally abnormal state.

Gandhi quote: Spiritual relationship is far more precious than physical. Physical relationship divorced from spiritual is body without soul.


  1. I believe the idea of what is so called "good sex" and "bad sex" is way too limiting. I think if sex was something less connected with shame and obligations and more to do with communication, lust and honesty - whether in a romantic relationship or not - then we would see less sex scandals. And less infidelity. Like you believe sex is such a fundamental part of being human, however I also know people who are simply not sexual at all. If we as humans were less judgemental about other people and focused more on being at peace with ourselves that would be great!

    1. You make a good point. Who among us has the right to cast the first stone?

  2. I believe you've made a valid point. Too bad people don't respect the subject, themselves, or others when it comes down to it. Most men will do anything for it and women confuse it with love. The two should compliment each other, of course. If only peeps could figure this part out.

    Hugs and chocolate,

    1. Love the way you call them peeps. But you're right. Men and women should compliment each other.

  3. Thanks for the sharing. The marriage of the minds is the hardest to achieve! Thanks for sharing!


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